Globetrotters!!

Richard has been working really hard at Tek for the last FOREVER or so. In recognition of all the extra hours and working during the holiday shutdown and being on call pretty much 24 hours a day seven days a week, they gave him some tickets to the Harlem Globetrotters. We decided to take the older kids and when Richard told Jake about it, he was not interested because they are not in the NBA. I told him it would be worth it, so he decided to go anyway.

We rode Max into Portland, and that was fairly entertaining itself. We saw many different people from many different walks of life(a cute young man reading his bible, who scurried for the door when the ticket police came along, and the not so lucky drugged up woman who laughed spontaneously at nothing, drank from the soda someone had left on the floor near her seat and then got a ticket for not having a Max pass, oh wait, she did have one, it was an expired senior citizen pass and she was in her mid twenties I'd guess). I kinda like the melting pot that Max is, but some of the smells I could have lived without!! We got to the Rose Garden and the lines to get in were HUGE. Oh, did I mention the tickets were for the Tektronix box?? We got to go in the executive entrance with no wait at all. We found the suite and got settled in. There are several tv's in there, a small well stocked fridge, and lots of snacks-popcorn, 7 layer dip with chips, huge cookies, cheese and crackers, fruit and veggie trays. We felt very spoiled! We watched the game and of course it was a blast! It was even funner to watch Jake react to some of the cool moves the players can do with the ball. Amazing!

We got home at close to eleven. I had spent a good portion of the afternoon with my dad, he was having a very hard time, so I did not have time to do the grocery shopping earlier. Richard had meetings to prepare for, so I headed out to do the shopping alone. It is very quite at Winco at 11:30 on a Saturday night!! I got home shortly after midnight and went to bed.

I woke up bright and early, not because the kids woke me up, but because it was very quiet, so quiet, perhaps TOO quiet!! My dear sister Megan had offered to keep the lil ones over night so we wouldn't have to worry about picking them up so late! It was so nice not to have to worry about them! And they had a wonderful time with their cousins! It was a little odd to wake up without Joseph squirming into bed with me. I read the scriptures for a while and then I went to get them! It may sound weird, but I missed my little sweethearts! I am glad they had such a fun time with Auntie Megan and her family!

Trying Something New!

So, to go along with Richard's calling and the fact that we need to get to know people in our new ward, and that is going slowly, I decided to redefine our family in some ways. I am rather shy by nature and tend to feel anxiety when it comes to doing something new, or meeting new people-ok the thought of inviting strangers into our home is a bit terrifying to me....or was. I have always wanted to be the kind of person who can be spur of the moment, someone who can reach out to others and no worry about what they will think. I dream of having an open door to the world(so I am going to trick people into thinking that is the kind of person I am, shhhhh, don't tell)! I talked it over with Richard. Our plan...

Each Sunday I will be making a large meal. Hopefully we will get the chance to share it, but if not, into the freezer the rest will go, no harm done. Today was our first attempt and it worked out great! Richard invited his assistant mission leader and his wife to dinner and guess what....THEY CAME!! I made a huge crock pot of Chicken Tortilla Soup and they came to eat with us and we had fun talking and getting to know them, they are a fabulous couple. The old me would have worried that the house wasn't clean enough, or the dishes didn't match, or that Joseph would be too loud and crazy, and what would they think? The new me says, who cares!?! Why let those feelings stand in the way of being the person I want to be! Richard has met some families that are not very active, they have stated they don't feel like they fit in or know people well enough. So they are on our list too! I refuse to feel lonely alone. And if I am not alone, then I won't be lonely! Makes sense, right? Anyway, I really like the idea of redefining who I am and how I want people to see me and this seems like the perfect time since no one really knows me very well yet.

We will also be having the missionaries over on a regular basis and what a blessing that will be. I love missionaries. I adore the fact that they are so committed to the gospel and that they truly love serving the Lord. I know that just having them over for dinner has such a great effect on our home. I am looking forward to getting to know them and using our home to help in any way we can.

Thoughts come clearly while one walks. ~Thomas Mann

Today my sister Megan and I participated in a 5K with Jake. One of his cross country teammates planned the invitational for his Sr project. The money he raised is going to two different charities. It was a nice day for a run/walk. It rained lightly for a brief time and was nice and cool. So the run/walk was only 3.1 miles, and I was thinking that was no big deal, I must walk about that far when I go out on my own. But instead of warming up as Megan suggested and walking the first bit, we got caught up with the runners and started out running. I did not pace myself and so catching up from that took a while. Megan was so patient, she probably could have run more, and I encouraged her to go ahead if she wanted to, but she walked with me and we had fun chatting! We walked and ran small bursts and walked and walked and it seemed like far longer than 3.1 miles. But we did it, we finished and are feeling inspired to keep up our training and perhaps participate in a 10K this summer. And maybe even try to run the majority of it! Though I am not sure about running in the heat, but we shall see!! So I have been using MapMyRun.com to help me find good walking routes here in my neighborhood. The good news is I managed to put together a fairly straightforward route that is exactly 3.1 miles. That will be nice for trying to improve my time!

So I was thinking about walking and how much I enjoy it when I have the time to get out there. There is something very true about the quote I used for my blog title. When I am walking and my heart rate is elevated and I am huffing and puffing along, I am able to work out in my mind whatever issues have been bothering me. I am able to come up with plans and goals and stick with them. Walking/running is so great for our bodies, but it is also fabulous for the mind.

Psych215

I am taking Psychology 215 this term. After the stress and fast pace of Anatomy and Physiology, I am thoroughly enjoying this class! Well, I don't love that is is a 4 hour class. But it is nice to only have to worry about one day a week. Richard comes home early on Wednesdays and does his best to continue his work from here, while keeping track of Joseph and then Annalina a couple of hours later.

We are learning such fascinating stuff about the development of children and how we can help our children as they grow and I really wish this kind of class was mandatory for all parents. Anyway, yesterday we were talking about middle childhood and so the teacher asked me to bring Annalina in so everyone could observe her. Only about 4 of us in the class have kids. So at 3:30 Richard brought her to me and she drew pictures and talked about the things she likes and her friends and activities she does. It was fun. Afterward I got her a treat from the vending machine and we drove to the top of the parking structure and checked out the view. My kids are growing up. Sometimes I feel sad. Joseph is my snuggly guy and even he seems to be outgrowing the need to snuggle with me on a regular basis.

New Beginings

Richard and I spoke in Sacrament meeting a couple of weeks ago. It was actually kind of fun. In the past I have talked myself into not being nervous by telling myself that these are the people I love-my ward family, why wouldn't I want to share with them the great information I have found! Well, we know very few people so far, but I just know we will grow to love these people!

My talk was based on Elder Bednar's General Conference Talk "Nothing Shall Offend Them". A great topic that I really learned a lot from. No one can offend us, but we can choose to take offense from things others say or we can choose to let it go. Richard spoke on the importance of the one and how we need to be concerned about those who fall away due to being offended, or just weary. I have to say over the last few months since we moved I was thinking how nice a break from everything would be! It has been nice not to have to worry about a calling. My husband was extended the calling of ward mission leader. Wow, no way I will be able to take a break(not that I really wanted to). He will have Sunday's full of meetings and will be working closely with the missionaries. I am excited to support him in any way I can including going to Gospel Principles with him each Sunday. He is feeling overwhelmed, but I know he will do great! I am so proud of his willingness to serve the Lord in whatever capacity he is needed. He is an inspiration to me and I love him so much!

Life's Challenges

I have learned that life is easier to deal with when I remain optimistic. This is not always possible and there are very hard times that bring such sorrow to me. But I do not let those times and those emotions rule my life. I always try to see the bright side. As the song goes, "I like to look for rainbows whenever there is rain" and that is what helps me survive emotionally. It works, for me anyway!

Friday I went with my parents to a doctor appointment. My father was given a diagnosis of dementia due to Alzheimer's. Basically the doctor said all other reasons for memory loss have been ruled out and the only way to prove Alzheimer's 100% would be a brain biopsy. So we trust what the doctor says. It has been a long couple of years of knowing there was a problem and not knowing why or how to help. It is a very sad diagnosis, but at least we know for sure what is going on and the doctor can treat him accordingly. We will not get back the part of dad that has already left us, but maybe losing more of him can be delayed. The doctor called it the long goodbye. He is here with us, but he is not the same. It is so hard to grieve the loss of someone who is still here with us. I have received so much support from friends who can relate to what we are going through. Although I must say, most of the time I am hearing about someone's grandmother or grandfather who had it. This is my father, he is only 65. He still has young grandchildren. He is still so young himself to be going through such difficulties!

I miss my dad so much. I worked with him doing taxes for over 13 years and though I did not always like the work I was doing, I always loved seeing my dad. He has been my listening ear, my shoulder to cry on, he has freely given me advice when I needed it and has supported me through so much. He too, shared with me his concerns and thoughts, there was a special bond between us. There have been many times in the last few years when I so desperately wanted to confide in my father and have him understand and advise me. My father is a wonderful man and his life has been full of service to others. I know that he has passed his test here upon the earth and that what he is going through is more a test for us now. It is not always easy dealing with my father. He has been the head of a household full of girls and we have always looked to him. To be made to feel he can no longer be in charge has been very damaging to his self esteem. He is very defensive about his memory loss and that can make it hard to talk to him. He and my mother have a very difficult time communicating. It is hard to watch them each struggle with the other.

It is so hard to lose your parents this way. There is no way to grieve and move on, since they are still here with us, though the relationship has forever changed. And just when you think you are making progress towards a hint of the relationship you once had, something happens to destroy that progress and the pain is back, perhaps hurting more than ever.

I am grateful for my husband. He has spent many a late night with me, comforting me, drying my tears, listening to me without judging me. He helps me see things from a new perspective. He loves me and accepts me with all the family baggage that came with me! He is truly my hero and I absolutely adore him!

I am thankful for my sister Megan who is not just a sister, but a best friend. She too listens to me and she loves me. She calls me to check in. She is mindful of my needs and is always offering to help which is such a blessing. Especially since we moved and I have left the support structure of my ward, I have been even more grateful to have Megan so close and so willing to lend a hand when needed!

I am grateful for the gospel. I am so thankful for the atonement, which means so much more than forgiveness of my sins. To me it means I can pray for a change of heart. When the pain and anger gets to be too much, I can ask for help and receive a calm feeling. The atonement is the only thing that has kept me from breaking into a thousand little pieces from the pain that often times has to accompany this life.

As hard as they are, I am grateful for the trials we are given in this life. They truly do mold us into the person we need to be. I know I have changed a lot over my adult years. I hope I am becoming a better person, I feel as though some of the weaker areas of my personality are improving. And for this, I am grateful.