Can't go around, must go through

 It has been four years since I last saw him. I have felt this day pulling me in like a black hole for weeks now. It seems like last year was easier, but is there really any such thing in this situation? I miss him, I am furious with him, and I love him. Talk about a roller coaster. Thanks to my friends who have understood my need to be alone. And those who have offered words of comfort without expectation. The way I feel just isn't me. But I suppose it must be. I am forever changed, but I have learned of my inner strength. Please know dear friends, if you feel yourself sinking and cannot go on, I am here for you. I understand without judgement.

; Our story isn't over.

No School??

 What??? Rexburg is taking a snow day? I don't remember the last time snow was the reason! Well, blowing snow. Happy kids, back in bed!!

Christmas Recap

This Christmas was full of so much joy! All my kids were here, plus my bonus son Jon and of course sweet little Melanie. We felt the love of family and total strangers. We are truly blessed. And then I threw up, again and again for days, maybe weeks. No, not weeks, but it was a bad one. And I remember laying alone in the dark, wondering what day it was, and repeating to myself, it will be okay. Words Richard always told me. I tell myself now. I am strong. But I really miss that outside encouragement. And I sometimes miss letting someone else be strong for me for just a while.

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